Challenging Compassionately & Directly
Coaching is pointing out what I sense, hear and see to benefit the client.* The magic of coaching is in the set up and in the intentions. And it works. My superpower is that I am very empathetic and I listen exceptionally well, which creates an open and safe environment that bubbles with prospects. Another potential lies in the way coaching challenges a person’s thinking and beliefs compassionately and directly. Here is an example: Imagine someone who keeps putting off making arrangements regarding the succession of their business. Said person is in their 70s and their health has become a bit fragile. Asked in the right context with a compassionate intention, a direct challenge would be: “What if you were not able to attend to your business, starting tomorrow and…
Think in Positive Terms & Increase Your Potential
You have probably heard that our subconscious brain cannot process a negative command. In simple terms, when you are told, “Don’t think of a pink cat!”, you cannot help but think of a pink cat (mine had blue whiskers). And this brings me to my topic for today: Everything we create starts with a thought, then comes language, and communication, and slowly the world is created and recreated. Here is a thought to practice with: Imagine peace More: If you want to dive in deeper, think of a recent challenge and formulate it in positive instead of negative terms. An example: Instead of telling myself, “I want to spend less time sitting” (negative term), I say, “I spend more time walking” (positive term). See how one’s focus shifts? Walk more…
Minding The Little Things | Ice Crystals
There is such beauty in nature, such fragility and such joy. I happen to notice a lot of that in the little things that don't last long, such as ice crystals. Starting the day with that exquisite attention to detail creates a focus for my day that grounds my baseline mood in gratitude. Ice Crystals (February 6, 2024)
Gratitude Changes Life As We Know It
Are you a glass-half-full or a glass-half-empty person? Whichever one you are, you are right, and this perspective likely shapes how you see the world in general. Another metaphor is that every object casts a shadow in the daylight, and depending on your perspective, you might stand in the shadow or see the shadow that something is casting as dominating the whole picture. Gratitude compares to stepping into the sunshine and seeing the “other side” of things. It is just a matter of perspectives. Every position is subjective. We are free to change our perspective. What are you grateful for today? Photo by Mayur Gala, Unsplash 2024 ________________________________ Manuela Zeitlhofer | Mental Fitness & Nature Coach
Stewardship & Serenity
So often we find ourselves in despair because there is too much to worry about. Picking apart what can and cannot be changed can be a great way to empower ourselves and the ones in our care. Recently, my daughter expressed her frustration about worldwide pollution. It seemed that along with the sharing of facts, the school does little to catch those young minds as they battle the implications of what was shared with them. Tangled up in her questions, her frustration and her eagerness to make the world a better place, she asked me with some exasperation, what she can actually do. I pointed out that we are conscious of the packaging we buy, and we are purposeful with the way we use our car and the fuel (both…
European Starlings in North America | Contemplations about Invasive Species
A Story about Three Baby Birds A few years back, an old lady asked me to raise three newly hatched starlings that had she had found at the foot of a big old tree. Reluctantly, I took them in, and lo and behold I was able to raise and release them successfully. Whenever I see or hear starlings since then, I like telling my daughter that those are our three starlings saying thank you. Today, a extraordinarily big flock of starlings landed around the house and well beyond the creek. They were so loud it was both amazing and a little bit intimidating. Afterwards I thought about writing about this, as in "I had rescued the starlings and they came back with all their friends to thank me", when I…
Finding Your Wild Self & Living A Full Life
Manuela & Anya, 2022 The doors to the world of the wild Self are few but precious. If you have a deep scar, that is a door, if you have an old, old story, that is a door. If you love the sky and the water so much you almost cannot bear it, that is a door. If you yearn for a deeper life, a full life, a sane life, that is a door. ― Clarissa Pinkola Estés (Photo by Sandra Grünewald, Unsplash, 2023) One of my doors is behind the pain and loneliness I experienced when I was a toddler, in a hospital, for several months, tied down so I would not fidget with my leg (it was in a cast), or stand up (which might have jeopardized the…
Connecting over Garbage
At first, we saw some garbage, the usual, a few discarded food containers, a coffee cup lid, carelessly dropped or lost by the inattentive visitor. Nothing that could not easily be picked up and collected in a small garbage bag later (and I generally do, because it hurts my eye more to see the garbage than it is an effort to pick it up and dispose of it in a designated spot). It was a hot Sunday. We decided to go for a swim at a place along a river, where the water cascading over sheet rock is easy to access and not too deep. Walking on we came across an abandoned campsite, with bottles and aluminum foil in the fire pit. Right next to it was a good sized…
Minding the Little Things
Leopard Frog I just came across a very small (what I believe to be a) leopard frog. Why I saw it? – Because it moved. Once it stopped, I had a hard time finding it again. Can you spot it in the picture-insert? Leopard Frog, June 28, 2023 When I held out my hand the frog jumped on it. It did not stop but kept moving, and I felt fortunate to get one shot with the little amphibian in focus. I am sharing this experience, because I felt so passionate about this sighting, so amazed at how tiny, how perfect and how fragile this little frog is. That created a sense of responsibility and reverence in me. What I learned from the encounter: Frogs are amazing. Life is precious. I…
In the Face of Negative Emotions
What is the Gift of Negative Emotions? I generally like to present myself well composed and in control of my negative emotions. I don’t like to be seen when my negative inner voices - like my inner critic - get the better of me. Feelings of stress, anxiety, self-doubt, frustration, restlessness, and unhappiness can be very unsettling. I work through strong emotions best by going outside. Walking and running are always doing wonders for me. Mental fitness activities have added a new and unexpected effectivity for me. I still experience negative emotions, but more and more I feel AND see them for what they are, and that makes it possible for me to step aside and that really takes the edge off those emotions. You Are Not Alone If you…
Spirit Plants
When I lived in the Yukon, I was given a handful of Haskap berries. I harvested the tiny seeds and started them. I planted the little plants in a raised bed. They survived winter after winter, and after a three years they produced their first fruit. When I left the Yukon, I took some seeds with me. The whole story repeated itself, and we had our first berries last summer. This summer, we have such an abundant harvest, which made me think that Haskap bushes are definitely my spirit plant: They are easy going, produce fruit very early in the season and for an extended period, they are abundant, appreciative of what I can give them, they are decorative, and they are not of interest to little harvesters like chipmunks…
Your Body Has You Covered
When the fog is too thick for you to find your way around, your body knows where to go. That might be a bit of a metaphorical exaggeration. Please bear with me as I unroll my thoughts: Unfortunately, our area is currently experiencing dense smog from wildfires in this and other provinces of Canada. While we cannot really smell it (unlike yesterday, when the smell of a cold fire pit hung in the air), my chest felt heavy this morning, I felt reluctant to take a deep breath, and a headache was (and is) lingering. I pointed out to my daughter that there are people who spend their lives in conditions like this, where the air is polluted all the time. And how lucky we can be that this is…
When Life Happens
We live on the side of a beautiful creek. In the spring, the water level is fairly high and the current is fairly strong; strong enough so I can swim in it without moving in relation to the shore line. It is perfect: cool, refreshing, clean. The birds are singing, the mosquitoes cannot get to me, and all I see is nature. I have a tendency to forget this beautiful setting, when the water level drops radically later in the season and the flow comes to a halt, until the creek is full of long algae. That is partially due to the fact that this creek drains from a lake that is dammed up so the people with cottages around it can enjoy the water all summer, when there is…
Fit Body & Fit Mind
I have good news and a reality check. Let me tell you a story, and you can see if you can find the good news! If you are lucky, your body was naturally fit in your younger years. For example, you could eat whatever you wanted without gaining any weight, for example, and you were naturally fit, even if you did not work out a lot. If you are anything like me, now that you are older, you are putting on weight much more easily, and to stay physically in shape takes time and dedication. Again, if you are lucky, you love healthy food, which can give you an advantage with regards to healthy eating habits. Me, I love crunchy vegetables and any kind of fruit. So now that we…
Canine Assisted Coaching Anyone?
Today I would like you to meet our dog Danica. Danica is an English Shepherd, and she is 6 months old. She has been with us since September, and she is in training to become a Therapy Dog, assisting me in my coaching. What Danica (along with so many of her fellow canines) brings into the world is her playful, gentle nature, and her ability to live in the moment, while never wasting time with grudges. Danica loves to play with her Frisbee and with sticks of all kinds. __________ Danica’s question for you: When was the last time you petted a dog? Danica and her Frisbee (12.1.2023) __________ Manuela Zeitlhofer | Mental Fitness & Nature Coach
Mental Fitness Snippet: Walking & Breathing
The snow is crunching under my feet. I breathe in while I take two steps. I breathe out while I take the next two steps. My mind chatters. I think: “In” (and take two steps), “out” (and take two steps). I let go of the thoughts that want to bubble up. “In…. out” (crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch). https://youtu.be/zzReU25B79Q __________ Manuela Zeitlhofer | Mental Fitness and Nature Coach
Pictures Touch
I use pictures in coaching to evoke reflection, inspiration, and associations. Something in a picture might evoke an association, a thought or a feeling that wants to be talked about. For example: In a coaching session, a client might say that they feel stuck. I might show them the following card, and they in turn can share what they see, and what the card makes them think about, thus getting the person “un-stuck”. Question: What does that card make YOU think about? Please comment or send me a message. Source: Dixit Board Game __________ If you are curious about more thought-provoking questions and inspirations, I am looking forward to meeting you in a Free Discovery Meeting:
The 3-To-1 Positivity Ratio
Research shows that our brains are hard-wired to over-emphasize the negative experiences we have. Due to an evolutionary survival mechanism called the “negativity bias”, the human brain holds on to and amplifies the negative much more than the positive. It was more essential for our distant ancestors to remember the experience with the dangerous bear, than the beautiful field of flowers. According to Dr. Barbara Fredrickson (University of North Carolina, 2009), we need three positive experiences for every negative emotional experience in order to keep a positive mindset. According to her, we can actively build a collaborative relationship between our survival minds and our thrive minds. This 3-to-1 ratio should be maintained both in thoughts and feelings, as well as in interactions with people that matter to us. 1 2…
Playing to our strengths
What Playing to Your Strength is Playing to your strength means doing what you are doing well and with passion, rather than doing other things that drain you with a lot more effort. An example: A friend’s son was assessed for ADHD. In the process, it was found that he is simply a kid who needs more physical exercise than he was getting in school and at home. It was not easy, but the school and the parents found ways for him to get more play time outside and more time when he is unplugged from any technical devices. This story led me to think about people in general: - Are we living our lives playing to our strengths or are we just playing along with the structures we find…